There is nothing in life that compares to being a dad. For pretty much all of my life, having kids was something to look forward to on the horizon. When my second child arrived, a beautiful girl we named Hazel, my life entered a new phase. I am so thrilled to tell my big girl she had a little sister, but we soon learned just how difficult life can be with two.
Tuesday, May 25
My second daughter was born just after noon at a birthing center in Saint Paul, Minnesota. At 9 lb. 15 oz. she was a big baby, but the delivery went smoothly. A couple hours after the birth we were on our way home to figure out how life works with two little ones. Everything seemed normal.
Wednesday, May 26
A nurse came to check on the baby and run some tests. We got a call from the pediatrician that night with some concern over her bilirubin level. Our little bean was waking to eat and energetic and doing well, so it seemed like everything was ok.
Friday, May 28
We saw the pediatrician in the morning and she said there was a small chance we would have to go to St. Paul Children’s Hospital. At 4 p.m. she called and said we needed to pack a bag and head to the NICU at Children’s. In the span of an hour we had to plan for a stay of unknown length, pick up our toddler from daycare and find somewhere for her to stay for at least the weekend.
My wife packed our bags and worked out the logistics while we were on the way to the hospital. She sat with our toddler in the waiting area while I checked in our little bean.
I’ve spent many hours in children’s hospitals in the past, but nothing prepares you for when it’s your child. I walked in holding my baby, answered a couple questions, and then there was a swarm of nurses around her. They hooked her up to sensors. They drew blood from her little newborn arm. She fought against everyone with every ounce of strength in her little body, screaming in rage and trying to push everyone and everything away. It was overwhelming.
All of this was because my new baby had alarming levels of bilirubin, which can lead to infant jaundice. For us, it was because she had a different blood type from mama. The main way an infant processes bilirubin from their system is through bowel movements. Apparently in extreme cases, UV lights can help. My little lady got some tiny sunglasses and was parked in a special little bed with two banks of lights on her. We could only take her out to breastfeed. For the first day they had to check her blood every four hours.
To help her body process things as quickly as possible, we would breastfeed her every two hours and then supplement that feeding with a bottle under the lights.The bed was essentially a firm sofa, one of us basically had to sleep on our side for both of us to fit. It was far from ideal, but at least there was space to sleep. My wife handled most of the feedings that first night and somehow I was able to grab a few hours of sleep.
Saturday, May 29
Our little girl’s numbers were improving and by noon they had decided they didn’t have to draw her blood so frequently. They decided early in the day that we were going to be staying overnight again. It was a day of waiting – feed the baby, wait for the blood draw and try to stay sane.
Sunday, May 30
We continued to make progress through the night, but the morning nurse led us to believe it was likely that we were going to need to stay for another day. The longer we were confined to the NICU the more helpless we felt. There was nothing we could do to speed the progress for our baby. We missed our big girl and the energy she brings to our life terribly. The thought of spending another night seemed overwhelming.
Just before nine we met with the doctors and our nurse and they announced that we had made enough progress and that we would be discharged later that day. We’d just have to come in for an outpatient blood draw the next day to make sure everything was staying stable.
And now, a couple weeks later, we are finally settling into a routine as a family. My wife is transitioning to life as a stay-at-home mom. I am enjoying a ton of family time on paternal leave from work.
Here are some of our lessons from the NICU:
- Jaundice is more common than we thought – Reaching out to a handful of friends about our situation, I learned that I had all kinds of friends and family who received UV treatment.
- Meals become real expensive – There was a refrigerator in our room and we could have brought things to eat, but it was pretty low on our priority list when we got the call. And with a breastfeeding mama we needed plenty of snacks.
- Nurses and doctors work brutal shifts – Being in the hospital over a holiday weekend, every medical professional we encountered was working 12 hour shifts.
We are very blessed. My heart goes out to everyone who has to spend time at the NICU. We were so touched by the kindness of the nurses. And a special thank you to my sister Summer for delivering a meal to us. From our family to yours, we wish you good health.
Until next month, stay inside! – Tom
What’s New at OiO
Programming Changes
After several episodes, we canceled OiO New Game + for the rest of the year. Doing three separate podcasts each month covering a myriad of games wound up being too much for the team.
While that standalone segment has been cancelled, the crew is expanding Game Pass Forever and releasing it as a separate item in your podcast feed each month. The new audio production schedule looks like:
- First of the month: Outside is Overrated Podcast and Tom and Joey Unfiltered (exclusive podcast for $10 supporters on Patreon).
- Mid-Month: Game Pass Forever
Game Pass Forever: Hellblade: Senua’s Sacrifice
In the first iteration of this standalone segment, Tom, Joey and Casey break down Hellblade: Senua’s Sacrifice, The crew breaks down the mechanics, protagonist and overall experience of one of the most interesting games we’ve covered.
Episode 37 of Outside is Overrated – Borderlands
In the latest episode of the podcast, Tom, Joey and Brian break down Tales From the Borderlands and Borderlands 3 and break down casting decisions for the Borderlands movie.